hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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