i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
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