check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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