fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
