had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Randomize
