i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
