is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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