I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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