They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
