I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
