Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
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