Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
