I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
