school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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