did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
