Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
