at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize