Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
