in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize
