We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
