Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
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