dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
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