wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Randomize
