I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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