oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize