ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
