Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
