she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
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