Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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