So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
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