So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize