sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
