Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
