how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
