my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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