I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize