Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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