Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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