sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
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