Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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