We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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