Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize