My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
