No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Randomize
