It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
You work out of a Hotel?
Your dad touched me again.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
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