Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
