She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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