Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize