Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Panties = found
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
