God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
